The perfect marriage is a reflection of God’s love for His people. It’s one flesh, walking together, graciously giving themselves to God and each other, sealed on each others’ hearts and arms for life. Sealed in love for a lifetime.
Below is an adaptation of a teaching in Reflecting Love in Marriage, A Wife‘s Call to Action on “Gracious Giving.”
The Song of Songs
The Song of Songs, or the Song of Solomon, has been considered by some Jewish rabbis as the “Holy of Holies” of Scripture. Portions of it were sung on the eighth day after Passover. In ancient times, it was recommended that young men not read the Song of Songs until they were married or turned 30.
Theologians believe that it is a beautiful picture of the marriage relationship as well as the love relationship that we have with our Lord Jesus Christ as the church is the bride of Christ. This small book of only 117 verses is a favorite of both Jews and Christians. The book is poetry, much like ancient Egyptian and Hebrew Love Songs.
Charles Spurgeon preached 59 sermons on the Song of Solomon, and Bernard of Clairvaux from the 11th Century preached 86 sermons on chapters one and two.
The title, Song of Songs, states that it is Solomon’s, setting the date around the middle of the tenth century BC. Commentators differ on the date, but David Hocking believes that the Song was written by King Solomon, and since verse 1:1 states that the Song of Songs is Solomon’s, we will approach it as if King Solomon wrote the poetry.
The Song of Songs, the best of all the 1,005 songs that Solomon wrote. THE song of songs.
King Solomon and His Wife
Solomon was the son of King David and Bathsheba. Solomon was an architect (2 Chronicles 3-4); a patron of the arts (1 Kings 4:32), an international trader (1 Kings 9:26-28; 10:11-22), and he roamed the country disguised as an ordinary person, including as a shepherd.
1 Kings 11:1-3 tells us that Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines. The custom in those days was for kings to make treaties, and the daughters would be given as pledges in keeping the treaties. They were placed in the king’s harem where eunuchs would take care of them.
We don’t know who the Shulamite was. Some speculate that the Shulamite may have been Solomon’s first wife who might have been the daughter of the Pharaoh of Egypt. David Hocking believes that she was Abishag who was brought into the King’s palace during the reign of David when he was old and dying (1 Kings 1:1-4).
The Song of Songs is love poetry that paints beautiful word pictures of gardens, vineyards, herbs, fruits, animals, treasures and jewels, banners, towers, and mountains.
We find Jesus throughout the images and references.
Beloved and the Shulamite delight in each other as God’s creation. As Jesus spoke in parables, the Shulamite and her Beloved speak with their senses, they taste, see, smell, hear, and touch each other and see God’s creation set in the garden.
They drink in each other’s beauty. The two breathe in each other’s goodness. They see each other through God’s eyes. The Shulamite hears her Beloved’s heart. Her Beloved embraces her fully. And they become one—one flesh, one heart, one life.
If we were to approach our marriages and our relationship with our Lord with the same preparations and anticipation, what would our marriages be like today?
As the two bask in the beauty of their treasured love, they collect jewels along the way, and they think of the other. His head is like gold. Her cheeks are ornaments, her neck is adorned with chains of gold. His abdomen is carved ivory set with sapphires.
Yes, they experience trouble. You can read about that in chapter 5. But the trouble is resolved.
Song of Songs 1:2-17
The Shulamite: Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—For your love is better than wine. Because of the fragrance of your good ointments, Your name is ointment poured forth; Therefore the virgins love you. … I am dark, but lovely, O daughters of Jerusalem, Like the tents of Kedar, Like the curtains of Solomon. Do not look upon me, because I am dark, Because the sun has tanned me. My mother’s sons were angry with me; They made me the keeper of the vineyards, But my own vineyard I have not kept. Tell me, O you whom I love, Where you feed your flock, Where you make it rest at noon. For why should I be as one who veils herself By the flocks of your companions?
The Beloved: If you do not know, O fairest among women, Follow in the footsteps of the flock, And feed your little goats Beside the shepherds’ tents. I have compared you, my love, To my filly among Pharaoh’s chariots. Your cheeks are lovely with ornaments, Your neck with chains of gold.
The Daughters of Jerusalem: We will make you ornaments of gold With studs of silver.
The Shulamite: While the king is at his table, My spikenard sends forth its fragrance. A bundle of myrrh is my beloved to me, That lies all night between my breasts. My beloved is to me a cluster of henna blooms In the vineyards of En Gedi.
The Beloved: Behold, you are fair, my love! Behold, you are fair! You have dove’s eyes.
The Shulamite: Behold, you are handsome, my beloved! Yes, pleasant! Also our bed is green.The beams of our houses are cedar, And our rafters of fir.
Song of Songs 1:2-17
Do you think that the Shulamite is in love with her Beloved?
A Stolen Kiss
After a few dates, Keith stole a kiss by the elevator in the university’s dorm where I was living.
PDA! Public Display of Affection! We’d just been lectured about that from our floor monitor.
That started a life-long love adventure with my Beloved. The kiss was just the starting point.
As I learned more about this young man, the more I admired him. Admiration came before love.
I had prayed for the man that God was preparing for me in high school. Now, here was that man. But I didn’t know it then.
Powerful Kissing
Did you know that when we kiss, our lips engage 5 of our 12 cranial nerves? A passionate kiss releases dopamine that leads to intense desire, loss of appetite, and much more.
Kissing also releases oxytocin, the love hormone, and serotonin which helps regulate our mood and sexual desire. In addition, a passionate kiss can cause our blood vessels to dilate and our hearts race.
Did you know that kissing was so powerful? “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth!“
Love flooded my being. It was better than anything that I had ever experienced. Sweet to the taste. Intoxicating. Who is this wonderful young man?
Set Apart
He smells good! He’s anointed with fragrant oils.
Anointing oils were used to consecrate people or objects as holy and set apart to the Lord. Genesis 28 is the first mention of pouring oil out.
Jacob dreamed that he saw a ladder to heaven, and the angels were ascending and descending. God stood above the ladder and promised Jacob that his descendants would bless the earth and that He would be with Jacob wherever he went.
The next morning, Jacob took the stone where his head had rested and set it up as a pillar, pouring oil on it and naming the place Bethel, the house of God. Setting the stone apart for God.
Sealed With A Good Reputation
Names described the person and her character or essence, and sometimes names were changed. God changed Jacob’s name (heal-catcher or supplanter) to Israel (strives with God or God strives) after Jacob wrestled with God.
Solomon’s name means “peace.”
Paul tells the Philippians in Philippians 2:9 that Jesus’ name is the name above all names. His character and nature is above all, for He is our Creator, our Savior, our High Priest, our Friend, and our Bridegroom.
Do you have a special name for your husband? Does he have one for you?
If not, you might think about this. The name for Beloved is dôḏ (dode) or dodi.
The name for “my love,” raʿyâ.
If you don’t have a love name for your husband, today is the day to do it.
To think that God prepared my man for me as a gift was more than I could imagine. Why would God favor me with such an incredible man? I’m not worthy. The Shulamite felt the same way.
Remember how you described your husband
when you were dating.
My husband, Keith, joined me in the teaching.
We want to read to you a few of the verses in this Song of Songs. We read the book of the Song of Songs to each other on our anniversary.
The passages we will read tonight are the ones we read to each other to celebrate our 30thanniversary. We renewed our vows in the Garden Tomb in Jerusalem and read these verses to each other.
We’re reading from the NASB version of the Bible, since that was the one we marked up and had with us 23 years ago.
Ladies, you might want to refer to your handout.
Keith, Song of Songs 4:1-11
Karen, Song of Songs 5:10-16
Thank you, my Beloved.
Sealed in Love
Now let’s turn to Song of Songs 8:5. We want to spend a few moments here.
“Who is this coming up from the wilderness Leaning on her beloved? Beneath the apple tree I awakened you; There your mother was in labor with you, There she was in labor and gave you birth.“
They’ve been married for a while, and she is leaning on her beloved. She is close to him. She is leaning in on his love. They are one.
They are remembering their youth.
The apples in Song of Songs 2:5, “Sustain me with cakes of raisins, Refresh me with apples, For I am lovesick.” The apple seeds have now grown into an apple tree. Their love has flourished.
The Shulamite speaks to Her Beloved in verse 6: “Set me as a seal upon your heart, As a seal upon your arm; For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; Its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame.”
Seals were highly valued and carried on a cord around the neck or on the arm. The seal was used to finalize a covenant, a lasting agreement between people. The Shulamite is asking her Beloved to set her as a seal on his heart, the core or center of his thoughts and emotions. Not only does she want to seal her Beloved’s heart but also his arm, his actions and his power.
One flesh, walking together, graciously giving themselves to each other, sealed for life. Sealed in Love.
“… for love is as strong as death.”
There’s no going back. Death is final, and love is final. How many of you said the traditional wedding vows when you got married? “Until death do us part.”
“The price for ahava love is the gift of oneself. We give love freely, and the return on that investment is invaluable. Giving love is the best love of all.”
(Sharon Jaynes, Lovestruck, 180)
We give love freely and finally. We seal that love on his heart and his arm.
“Jealousy as cruel as the grave.”
“Whenever love absorbs the heart, jealousy will guard the object of affection.”
(Charles Spurgeon)
“For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; Its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame.”
The Legacy Standard Bible, a new Bible translation sponsored by John MacArthur, translates the phrase like this.
“For love is as strong as death, Jealousy is as severe as Sheol; Its flashes are flashes of fire, The very flame of Yah [God].” Song 8:6c (LSB)
“Death (môt) and Sheol, along with Flames (rešep), were deities in the Ancient Near East, so a climactic reference to the true God of love seems plausible. Perhaps the most elegant translation, retaining something of the ambiguity of the original, is ‘an Almighty flame’”[1]
Iain M. Duguid
Love’s Seal Prevails
“Many waters cannot quench love, Nor can the floods drown it. If a man would give for love All the wealth of his house, It would be utterly despised.” Song of Songs 8:7
Love costs a person everything. We can’t buy love. Love is freely given. The Love of Yah, the love of God, cost Him His Son, Jesus. The love of your husband costs you your very life, your heart, your thoughts, your emotions, your actions, and your vey being.
What action will you take today to set yourself as a seal on your husband’s heart and arm?
Related Links
Reflecting God’s Love in Marriage … Love Lighting the Way
[1] Iain M. Duguid, The Song of Songs: An Introduction and Commentary, ed. David G. Firth, vol. 19, Tyndale Old Testament Commentaries (Nottingham, England: Inter-Varsity Press, 2015), 155.
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